Wed 14 Oct 2009
By Diva Nikki
(c) October 14, 2009
You’re finishing up your workday, answering a few more e-mails and tidying up some papers on your desk. The phone rings and you see on the caller ID that it’s your husband.
Not uncommon – there are often calls like this at the end of the day to discuss what to pick up for dinner. So you answer, phone crooked between your ear and shoulder so you can multi-task while talking. And then you hear the words…
“Honey…I’m so sorry to tell you this. But I just lost my job.”
The typing stops. Your hand comes up to hold onto the receiver because you need to hold onto something right now. You no longer even see the papers on your desk because you’ve developed a sort of tunnel vision. And it feels like your heart just landed in the pit of your stomach.
How do I know? Because I’ve been there. Three times in six years of marriage, I’ve been there and gotten that phone call. My name is Diva Nikki, and I’m a Desperate Workingwife.
Things you need to hear: Don’t panic, and you’re not alone.
Despite your initial instincts, should you be in the midst of one of these phone calls right now, remember the reason that the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy was so popular was because it had the words “Don’t Panic” in large, friendly letters on the cover.
That’s what this series is about. Every Wednesday I’ll be here, helping you–the supportive spouse or loved one of the person now unemployed and occupying space for many hours a day on your couch–to cope with this journey without panic.
It’s amazing to me that there are tens of thousands of books available from Amazon for people who are unemployed– everything from financial advice to meditations. But in a recent search I did, I couldn’t find one book that offered support or advice to the spouse of an unemployed person. You’d think no unemployed person ever had a spouse there with them through their journey.
That’s the other reason for this series. To let you know that you–the one working a full-time job, carrying the insurance and dealing with your own career issues while supporting your unemployed loved one–are absolutely, positively not alone.
I’m not saying I’m going to have answers to every question. I’m not saying my advice or tips will work for everyone. What I am hoping is that by sharing my experiences you’ll feel like someone out there cares about you and wants to help. And hey, if you learn a few things along the way, that will make two of us!
Stay tuned for the next installment of Desperate Workingwife on Wednesday, October 21: “Avoiding the Elephant in the Room (Part I): What Not to Say to a Spouse in Career Transition.”